I'm out of the office until Monday 4th January 2016

I've given myself to someone as a Christmas present, so I'll be out of the office until I've been unwrapped, discarded, exchanged for something more impressive and then returned to my desk.

If you need any help over the festive period, you can contact me on my mobile.

Merry Christmas.

I'm out of the office until Wednesday 23rd December 2015

I received my new passport on Thursday, but there's been a mix up and it appears that I'm now North Korean, so I'll be out of the office until I manage to successfully challenge my deportation order.

If you need anything while I'm away, you can contact me on the mobile.

In the meantime, "jangsuwa beon-yeong" as I think we say.

I'm out of the office until Friday 18th December 2015

Last night I had a dream where I was sitting at my desk, but I got up and left the office until Friday 18th December. Then you emailed me and received a message saying that you should contact Lindsay or Lou if you needed any help.

Imagine my surprise when I woke up and discovered it was all true!

I'm out of the office until Tuesday 15th December 2015

Following Graham's discovery last week, the Creative Department have decamped to his house en masse, where we'll be panning for gold in the stream at the bottom of his garden. Graham's told us that we have to keep working until we've made enough to cover the cost of his new car, but Steve's just found a massive nugget, so I reckon we could back to the office as soon as next Monday.

I'm out of the office until Tuesday 15th December 2015

I've spent all my money on a massive pair shoes made of gold. Man, they look awesome.

Unfortunately, they're so heavy that I can't move when I'm wearing them, so I'll be out of the office until: a) I can bear to be without them, or b) my legs get stronger and I can manage to walk.

In the meantime you can contact Lindsay or Lou if you need any help.

They bought saffron sandals, which with hindsight was a much better idea.

I'm out of the office until Tuesday 8th December 2015

I was mixing up a new batch of work last Friday and made it waaaaay too weak.
Normally it'd be strong enough to last for a full week, but the consistency of this stuff means I'll definitely be out of the office until Tuesday 8th December.

If you need anything while I'm away, you can contact Lindsay and Lou. They both get theirs from the shop, so it's always pretty reliable - doesn't smell as good as my home-made recipe, though.