I'm out of the office until Thursday 2nd June 2016

I've been locked down after a leak, so don't bother trying to contact me until the decon crew have flushed the system and run a full diagnostic.

Contact Rosie, Lou or Lindsay if you need anything until I pass standard level 2 checks.

I'm out of the office until Friday 27th May 2016

I'm harvesting strands of absence from a field of time.

On finding a seed of enquiry, call on Rosie, Lou or Lindsay.
Perhaps they will plant it in the fertile soil of their knowledge, from which springs forth the flowers of enlightenment.

Either way, I'm not in.

I'm out of the office until Wednesday 18th May 2016

Some science thing's happened that's left me weightless and drifting away from the office.

If you need anything while I'm away, you can contact Rosie or Lindsay, although I'm not too sure they fully understand the seriousness of the situation.

I say "seriousness", but what I obviously mean is "gravity".

I'm out of the office until Friday 13th May 2016

In last night's pub quiz tiebreaker, the question was,
"Who is out of the office until Friday 13th May 2016?"
I told them it was me - which was the right answer.
First prize was two nights in a hotel somewhere quite far away, so I'll be out of the office until Friday 13th May.

If you need anything while I'm gone, you have to answer the following question:
"What can Rosie and Lindsay help you with?"
Send your answers to Rosie and Lindsay.